5 years ago
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
At Meadow Heights, our pastor has a prayer that he prays on a regular basis, and he encourages us to all pray the same thing: "God, yes! Amen." It's a simple prayer of surrender to God, trusting in Him to show His will in His time. Inherent in this prayer is an attitude of complete trust in God, giving up control of the situation and trusting Him to lead the way. It was introduced during the "Next" series when Bryan challenged us to take the next steps in our lives as related to the five biblical purposes of the church. Since then, he's often reminded us to pray it in various situations in life.
Most people who know me realize that I am a control freak. I don't trust anyone. That's been a huge stumbling block in my life for some time as I tried to do way too much and not let others come along side and help. My philosophy has been it will be easier to do it myself than to show someone else how to do it or go behind them and change it when I'm not happy with the outcome. A good way to make friends? Not really. Recipe for a stressful life? You bet!
For a few months, I've been practicing the art of delegation - I've found very competent leaders to help out in various situations and I've given them responsibilities and watched them be successful. I've watched them grow, and in the process, I've been able to accomplish much more. I've actually enjoyed it!
My lack of trust for other people has, from time to time, hindered my ability to pray the "God, yes! Amen" prayer. In fact, I've often found myself wanting to scream out just the opposite: "God, NO! Amen." I'm in one of those places right now where I'm finding it more and more enticing to just tell God that I don't want to wait for His timing, that I have plans I want to pursue, and I'd like to call the shots for a little while.
Today, I sent application materials to a school district for an administration position . . . the twelfth position I've applied for. I'd like to tell God "no" when He tells me to be patient and wait for the position that He has in store for me.
This past weekend, we started a 21-day campaign of prayer, fasting and Bible reading to prepare for what the future has in store for Meadow Heights (there's a link in the right column of my blog to some of the things I find during the campaign.) Last night, as I sat down to eat brown rice and lintels, I wanted to tell God "no" and pull out the bag of M&Ms that's nestled in the cabinet over the oven.
A few years ago, I got tired of waiting for the spouse that God had in mind for me. I wanted to tell Him "no" and go out to search for her on my own. I tried. It didn't work.
I wonder if Jesus ever wanted to just look up at heaven and scream, "no!" I wonder if he got tired of waiting on God's timing and doing God's will. You know how we often think that we're smarter than our parents - I wonder if Jesus ever thought, for a split second, that he was smarter than his Father.
Right now I'm in that place where it's very tempting. Sometimes I think about giving up God's best plans for my life to try to feel like I'm in control. Then I remember all that He's brought me through so far, and all the times when I didn't think He knew what He was doing. I look at the results of all the times that God led me through in His time and I remember that "no" is not an option. If I want the best things in life, I just have to say "God, yes! Amen."
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