"We need to stay the course. The mission is doable, and we don't need to back off that right now." It's not the latest blurb on Iraq or even an attack on the critics of Al Gore's crusade to end global warming. It's not even about finding out who is the father of Anna Nicole's baby. The latest "stay the course" rhetoric is from U.S. Deputy Education Secretary Raymond Simon in "'No Child' Target Is Called Out of Reach: Goal of 100% Proficiency Debated as Congress Weighs Renewal," an article from the March 14 issue of the Washington Post. The mission he's talking about is 100% of students nationwide scoring proficient or advanced on mandatory tests by the year 2012.

You'd think someone in charge of the nation's education system would know a little bit about statistics and probability, but according to Robert L. Linn, co-director of the National Center for Research on Evaluation, Standards and Student Testing at UCLA, Mr. Simon's mission is impossible. "There is a zero percent chance that we will ever reach a 100 percent target," Linn said. "But because the title of the law is so rhetorically brilliant, politicians are afraid to change this completely unrealistic standard. They don't want to be accused of leaving some children behind."

Brilliant! Teachers from coast to coast have been arguing Mr. Linn's point for years, but we've been accused of trying to lower standards, giving up on kids, and avoiding our professional responsibility.

No Child Left Behind has not been entirely bad, and there are aspects that should probably be salvaged. It has spurred plenty of conversation and brought everyone's attention to school improvement measures. It has made us reconsider why we teach what we teach, and in some cases it has been a good tool for such evaluation. Besides the fact that it tries to shift responsibility for education from the states and local communities to the federal government and peddles unfunded mandates like crazy, the crucial fault lies with the law's preposterous notion that 100% of any group of students can score proficient or advanced on a single test.

President Bush, Secretary Spellings and Deputy Secretary Simon, listen to the experts. As Southeast Missourians like to say, "ain't gonna happen."